It was a regular school day like any other, in 2002, when my mother, who was also my Principle, accompanied with an advisor, walked into our classroom to tell us that one of our classmates, committed suicide the night before. Steeve Eder Bois, was found in his room, with a gunshot in the head, and the gun not far from his body. I remember having to go to his funeral, and walking by the casket, paying respect to his grieving family, and looking over the casket, wondering what could have possibly pushed him to do such thing. His death was hard on all of us. We were classmates ever since middle school, and now at the age of 13, he had the courage to put a gun to his head and take his life away. What had hurt me the most, was the fact that, this boy who had been in the same classroom as me, for over 5 years, got to a point in his life, where he thought that he no longer wanted to live, probably overwhelmed with issues that could have been resolved with a little help, yet, he had no one to turn to. He was there with us everyday, and still felt as though no one could help. The morning that he died, we were all at basketball practice, yet no one noticed that he wasn’t there. Just after we were told about his death, we noticed that he left a farewell note on the board, yet no one noticed his note until his death was mentioned.
Most often than not, when we are faced with circumstances that are overwhelming, we feel like there is no one to turn to. It is so ironic the number of people that I know, including those that I call my friends, and my family, but when I need a shoulder to lean on, I go through my contacts and can’t find one person I can call. Other times, you try to reach out to someone, but they’re not available, or they have their own issues to deal with.
It is important to find refuge in times of trials. I hate complaining to people about my problems, but when I feel like things are taking over me, I often take refuge in something that I enjoy, something uplifting, although I may not find the solution to my problem right then and there but it does ease the pain. Pain is temporary. It fades away. No matter how you may be feeling, it shall come to pass. I thank God for a praying mother. I hate to admit it, but I don’t have the relationship that I desire to have with God. So when I feel like I’m losing hope, I reach out to mother, and ask her to lift me up in prayer, because it can get to a point where we get worn out. But God always places someone in our paths that is able to uplift us. Sometimes it’s my sister, other times it’s an old friend, it can even be a quote, or a book, a song…. whatever God knows you will need to help you out is often there, but we let our issues take the best of us. Never be afraid to seek shelter from rain, late in the midnight hour, when its only you, your tears, and your pillow, God is closer than you think and He is just a prayer away.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted. He recues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18